Sunday, 31 May 2015

Although I didn't sleep very well and got up late, I got a lot done today.

I got new front tires for my car. The right one was flat, and the left was too worn. They threw in a free front alignment.

I got 2 new audio extension cords for the computer I work on. One it to replace the old headphone sound-out cord, which failed (but luckily not completely during my Friday lesson), and the second is just a spare in case the microphone also fails. These are important, because if they fail when I'm in a lesson and I have no replacement, Berlitz will take the lesson away from me and I won't get paid.

I paid the rest of the money for David's tombstone today, and it should be all ready within a few days.

My problems from the weekend are resolved now, and thus I was able to help a new friend with several things he needed.

Shabbat, 30 May 2015

I got up very late today and had a rather difficult day.

I think I've learned some valuable lessons, but I won't go into any details, so please don't ask.

Friday, 29 May 2015

I again got up too late to go out for a walk.

I taught 4 units of Berlitz lessons this morning: 9:30-11:00 and 11:30-1:00.

I ate at home because I my car had a flat tire. The guys finally came to change it and put the low-mileage spare on at about 6:00 p.m.

In the evening, my friend, Meir, and I made Shabbat by lighting candles, sipping a bit of wine, and eating a little challah.

צדיק כתמר יפרח, כארז בלבנון ישגה

שתולים בבית יי, בחצרות אלהינו יפריחו

עוד ינובון בשיבה, דשנים ורעננים יהיו

להגיד כי-ישר יי, צורי, ולא-עולתה בו

A righteous person will be fruitful like dates, will grow tall like a cedar in Lebanon.

Planted in the house of the Eternal, in the courts of our Divine One they will flourish.

Still in old age they will be renewed, like fresh green lawns will they be,

To tell that the Eternal one is honest, my Rock, in whom there is no evil.

[from Psalm 92, a song for the day of Shabbat]

Thursday, 28 May 2015

I got to bed very late last night and so didn't get in a morning walk today.

I taught 7 units of Berlitz lessons today: 9:00-10:30, 2:30-4:45, and 5:00-6:30.

I had 2 pre-cooked beets and a mixed salad for lunch at home today.

Today's story about David is actually a story that David's father told him when he was a little boy, and which David and I loved to refer to when we saw the sun setting:

Stories about David: Where does the sun go at night?

This is a little story that David’s father used to tell him when he was a little boy, and David and I often referred to it. It was his dad’s response to the question, “Where does the sun go at night?”

When the sun gets very low in the west, there’s a little man with a burlap bag who gets ready to catch it. As soon as it’s in the bag, the man runs as fast as he can, all night long, to take the sun over to the eastern horizon so it can come up in the morning.

Isn’t that just perfect!

Wednesday, 27 May 2015

I got up early this morning and so got in a nice, full walk.

I talk 5 units of Berlitz lessons, all back-to-back this morning: 9:00-10:30 and 10:30-12:45.

I had a delicious vegan Caesar Salad at Café Café for lunch today.

This afternoon, I met a new friend, and there may be further developments. Stay tuned!

Today's story about David is one that Jeff already told at David's BCC memorial, but I had remembered it and planned to tell it even before that. Here it is:

Stories about David: David in Haredi Drag, and the Confused Policeman

David went through part of our time in Tsfat dressed in Haredi garb: black pants, white shirt, long black coat, and Haredi hat (but not a fur one). It was really only a look, though -- he didn’t become particularly observant.

One time, our friend, Jeff, was visiting us from the California, and we were driving together to the Family Minyan, a Conservative congregation in Kfar Vradim, which was our regular synagogue at that time.

As we came to the place where the road crosses Nakhal Amudim, not far from Tsfat, there was a roadblock where police were stopping some of the cars. This happens fairly often here in Israel, and it’s nothing to be alarmed about. But we looked quite suspicious, because real Haredim would CERTAINLY NOT be riding in a car on Shabbat! Jeff’s Hebrew was actually better than mine, at least at that point, so he was able to tell the policeman where we were going and why. The cop still seemed rather confused, but he didn’t detain us.

Tuesday, 26 May 2015

I got up quite early this morning, but I only walked for about half an hour on a nearly-level route because it was so warm out.

I enjoyed the WIZO English speakers' meeting this morning, mostly for the conversation. We also played a little game something like "20 questions".

I had an appointment to talk with the Maccabi social worker, Jackie, today, just as a kind of check up to make sure I'm doing okay.

I was able to pay nearly half of the cost of David's tombstone today, using money I got from my U.S. Visa card. I'll pay the rest next Sunday.

I had a Japanese salad and pad thai today for lunch at Togarashi at Mercaz Big. Afterwards, I did a little shopping and found a couple of very inexpensive yet comfortable tank tops, one white and the other black.

I managed to get myself to sweep the whole house today. I can't even remember the last time I did that. I'm trying to establish some cleaning habits, because I'm sure I won't be able to afford a cleaning person, even it I could find one.

I taught only 2 units of Berlitz today: 7:00-8:30.

Here's today's story about David, from our early days in Tsfat (also told at David's BCC memorial by Jeff):

Stories about David: Aliyah at the Tsfat Sephardi Synagogue

Within a month or two of arriving in Tsfat, David and I decided to attend the nearest synagogue on a cold Shabbat morning. In fact, it was still under construction, and the sanctuary upstairs was not finished, so they were meeting in the basement. Of course, it was an orthodox synagogue, and, in fact, was Sephardi, which meant that NONE of the melodies were even familiar.

We sat there lost, for the most part, but at one point someone came to David and called him to the front. We were able to figure out that they were giving him an aliyah to the Torah (to watch part of the reading from the Torah scroll and to say blessings before and after). This was a real honor, especially since we noticed that normally they auctioned off the aliyot (plural of aliyah) to the highest bidder! Nevertheless, I think we only attended there one other time, much later, after they were meeting in the completed sanctuary, but I don’t remember anything else at all about that second visit.

Monday, 25 May 2015

I got up late this morning because of getting to bed a couple hours late last night, so I didn't attempt to go out for a walk.

I taught 6 units of Berlitz lessons today: 9:00-10:30, 11:00-12:30, and 3:30-5:00.

After my second lesson, I went down to Ice Park, where I got a massage at Dream Spa (in one of their wonderful machines) and then ate lunch at Landwer Café. Afterwards, I went over to the tombstone place to finalize the writing for David's tombstone and to try to pay. I was very successful in the former, but not in the latter. The guy was very helpful and worked with me to get the words and the spacing just right. I think he was using Corel Draw. In any case, I know exactly what it will look like, and I think it will be nice.

The problem with paying was that they can't accept foreign credit cards, and I need to pay with my American money since my shekel income is quite limited. After I got home, I found a way to get cash from my U.S. Visa card, so the problem is now solved, except that it will take a few days to get it all due to the daily limit on cash.

In the evening, I did the weekly grocery shopping at Shufersal. I got some corn on the cob, a package of already-cooked beets, and a package of chopped vegetables so I can have at least one lunch at home this week and still get a healthy variety of food. I hope that, in the long run, this will be a way to save a little money without comprising my health.

I generally felt quite good today. I think there are a number of reasons for this. First, there is the simple passage of time. Second, and maybe the most important, was BCC's wonderful memorial for David. Third, there's the social contact that my dear friends here in Eilat have been providing for me. Fourth, there was my success today at the tombstone place, where I comfortably did everything I needed to do in Hebrew. All these factors, and probably others, are helping me get through the darkness and moved forward. Thanks to all of you who have been a part of my healing (and I know will continue to be)!

Here's today's story of David, a much happier cat story:

Stories about David: Beatrix

After we had been living in Tsfat for a while, David saw a wild female cat with two young kittens. She was clearly not well-fed at all, and, of course, neither were her kittens. He took pity on her and insisted that we feed her, so we did.

For quite a while, she was so afraid that she wouldn’t even eat if she knew we were watching. But gradually she became less and less afraid, and eventually she even let us pet her. We decided to name her Beatrix.

One of the kittens disappeared (probably died), but the other survived. Since he looked so similar to his mother, we named him Mini-Me. They both became our outdoor pets, and we fed them every morning.

Not too much later, Beatrix became pregnant again, and we were pretty sure the father was a yellow male that also had begun hanging around and whom we named Ts’hovi. He could be a nice cat, but unfixed males are always a bit ornery. Still, we rather liked him, partly because he “talked” -- meaning he made a lot of varied sounds instead of just a few simple meows. He had a hoarse voice, like someone who had smoked heavily for many years.

One day in late March, when Beatrix was obviously near full term, she disappeared for a couple of days, and then reappeared one morning, obviously NOT pregnant anymore. We continued feeding her every morning, but after a couple of months had passed and we had seen no kittens at all, we began to wonder if they had survived. We needn’t have worried. One day we saw a couple of them on our neighbors’ front porch. One was a tabby (like Beatrix), but the other was a beautiful black cat with some white on him.

We eventually learned that there were SIX kittens in the litter. Besides the two mentioned, there were 2 more tabbies, a tortoise shell, and a calico. In due time, we gave them all names and, in due time, got them all fixed. We also got Beatrix fixed so she wouldn’t get pregnant again. We continued feeding them outdoors but eventually decided to adopt Pascal (the black-and-white one) and, later, Peachy (the calico) as indoor cats (much to the distress of Katom, our American cat!).

Peachy died about a year ago, but Pascal is still going strong and is one of the most amazing and intelligent cats I have ever known. He also “talks” like his father, except his voice isn’t hoarse (because we didn’t let him smoke, hah!).

Sunday, 24 May 2015 (Shavuot)

I slept very well last night, got up early, and got in a nice, full walk before the sun even came up over the mountains of Edom.

This morning, I watched the wonderful Shavuot study session in memory of David at Beth Chayim Chadashim, our old synagogue in Los Angeles. I had quite a bit of trouble with the live stream and finally gave up watching it, but I had no trouble at all when I went in later and watched the recording. They truly did a moving memorial, and the study session was also very stimulating. If you want to, you can watch it, too. Here's the link.

For lunch, I went to Barbis and had a soya burger.

In the evening, I went to Isobel's place for a lovely dinner outside with several other friends.

Here's today's story about David, another one about cats:

Stories about David: Kat & Yusha

One day early in the Second Lebanon War, David and I were walking not far from our house (in Tsfat) when we heard some faint mewing. David had to check it out, and it turned out to be 2 very small kittens in the yard of one of our neighbors. Obviously, their mother was no where to be found. In fact, I had seen a cat on the road near there a few days before that had been hit and killed by a car, so that may very well have been their mother.

In any case, David insisted on trying to help them. The wife of the couple in whose yard we found them came out and helped us a bit, but we took them home with us to see if we could save them.

We named them Kat and Yusha, in honor (well, not quite the right word, but anyway) of the katyusha missiles that Hizbollah was shooting at us daily.

We gave them milk, and when we learned that that wouldn’t be good, we gave them ground up dry cat food with water. But they had been without their mother for too long, and they were too young, so they didn’t make it. One of them died, in fact, sitting on my lap. It was very sad. We actually gave them a proper burial in the front yard of our house.

Shabbat, 23 May 2015

Since I got to bed much later than usual last night (about midnight), I also didn't get up until very late, so there was no question about going out for a walk.

For some reason, in recent days, breakfast has become one of the more difficult times for me. I'm not completely sure why that is. In any case, I knew that I needed to get out of the house and do something today after breakfast, so I decided to go to the Underwater Observatory. David and I had been there several times, including when we came down to Eilat to look for an apartment. But there's a new exhibit there, the shark tank, that hadn't opened recently and which we had never seen. David had heard about it and wanted to go but had been too weak and sick for it to happen.

The new shark tank is really wonderful! When you first enter, the wall on the opposite side of the room is a HUGE glass window into the tank, and you can enjoy all the sharks, fish, and other creatures swimming around. The next view is a tunnel of glass where you can see them all on both sides and above you. After that, there is a small pool for the babies, and, at the end, there is another large window into the big tank. Throughout the whole exhibit there are many displays telling about sharks in general, particular types of sharks, and the importance of sharks. Everything is in English, Hebrew, Arabic, and Russian, the four more popular languages in Israel (and easy to distinguish from each other since they're written with 4 different alphabets!).

I also checked out the rest of the area, including the underwater observatory itself (actually in a room under the sea with windows all around to look at the coral reef!).

I enjoyed my visit, but my enjoyment was marred somewhat by my memories of being there with David and by not being able to share the beautiful new shark exhibit with him.

When I came home, I was still feeling a bit blue, so it was so wonderful to receive an SMS from my dear friend, Moshe, checking on me. He invited me over, which I quickly accepted. I just hung out there for a bit with him and his roommate, Barak, and then we went down and ate lunch together at the Gulf Restaurant, which has great Israeli food. Then we went back to their apartment and the 3 of us hung out together a bit more, watching funny videos from the internet on their big TV. Needless to say, my mood improved greatly. Thank you, Moshe and Barak! :-)

I came back home in time to have a really nice chat with David's sister, Joyce, in Ohio (over Skype).

Tonight at Beth Chayim Chadashim (BCC), our old synagogue in Los Angeles, they will be devoting a part of the tikkun leil Shavuot (all-night study during the night of Shavuot) to memories of David and studying some of his favorite texts. I look forward to watching this portion through their live video feed, which they plan to operate. It will happen at about 10:00 p.m., LA time, which will be at 8:00 a.m. tomorrow morning, Israel time. You should be able to watch, too, if you like, at this link.

Finally, here's today's story about David, which is also about his favorite cat, Katom (who's sitting right next to me and purring as I write this!):

Stories about David: Katom

In August of 2001, David and I were in one of our favorite pet stores in San Bernardino, the city where we lived at that time. I don’t remember exactly why we were there, but it was probably to get mice for our snakes. Anyway, there was a cage near the cashiers with several kittens in it, so, of course, we checked it out. We held a couple of them, but one really snuggled up to us (especially David) and purred, so we decided to buy him. He’s a yellow-orange cat, so we named him “Katom”, the Hebrew word for the color orange. It wasn’t until MUCH later that I learned that, as a noun, the word can mean “spot” or “stain”, explaining some of the slightly strange looks we get from Israelis when we tell them his name.

He was only 2 months old when we got him, which means he had been taken away from his mother a bit early. At first, of course, he was rather nervous exploring our big house, but he soon became quite at home there, and we became the only mother that he could remember, I think. Somewhere, I have a picture of David snoozing in my mom’s old recliner with Katom sleeping on his chest.

When we made aliyah (immigrated to Israel) at the end of 2005, there was never any question but what Katom would come with us. It was a more arduous trip for him than for us. When we finally got processed at the airport and went to pick up our luggage, Katom and his carrier were missing! Very shortly, though, we found him over by where there were some workers. When we got to Tsfat, our new house was empty so we couldn’t stay in it, but we did leave our boxes and suitcases and poor Katom there while we slept the night in a guest room of our contractor’s mother.

When the missiles hit near our house during the Second Lebanon War (summer of 2006), Katom went and hid in an unfinished space under the lowest step in the half basement. It took me quite a while to find him! Ever since then, he has been terrified of booms, including even distance thunderclaps that most of us barely hear.

Every time David was hospitalized (and there were many!), he would always want to come home as soon as possible, and his main given reason was to see his cats, especially Katom.

Now that David is gone, I have to be particularly careful to give plenty of love and attention to his best feline friend, our beloved Katom.

Friday, 22 May 2015

I got up very early this morning and got in a nice walk. It was so cool that I actually wore sock and shoes and a tank top. But I didn't feel cold. Before breakfast, I also walked down to recycle cardboard and buy challah for Shabbat.

I taught 3 units of Berlitz lessons today: 9:00-9:45 and 11:00-12:30.

For lunch, I had my usual Friday fare at Il Pentolino.

In the evening, my friends, Annette and Tony, invited me to their place for Shabbat dinner. Isobel also came, and we had a lovely evening. Tony is a retired London cabbie, so you can imagine the interesting stories he has to tell. And the view from their balcony is very nice: the Port of Aqaba, Jordan, and Hakl, Saudi Arabia.

Here's today's story about David, one of several highlighting his love of animals:

Stories about David: Saving a Gopher Snake on Reche Canyon Road

This story happened sometime during the years that we lived in a mobile home in Reche Canyon (in Colton, California).

David was driving home (or perhaps away from home, I don’t remember for sure, and I wasn’t with him) on the road in Reche Canyon. He saw a snake in the road and decided to help it. He blocked traffic (there must not have been much right then) and used the Club (a device we used to put on the steering wheel of our cars when they were parked to make it harder to steal them) to get the snake out of the road. I’m not sure if the snake crawled onto the Club or just moved due to some nudging. In any case, David saved it from almost certainly getting run over.

From his description, we later figured that it must have been a gopher snake. It certainly was NOT a rattlesnake, and those are about the only kinds of snakes one would see in the wild there (and not very often, at that). This, by the way, was quite some time before we began breeding snakes (but no gopher snakes).

Thursday, 21 May 2015

I got up early this morning and decided to walk the other directions, to the gym, as I used to do. It was nice for a change, and the weather was really wonderful out this morning.

Today was my first day back working. I wasn't sure exactly how that would go, but it was fine. In fact, the distraction was very good. Still, I'm glad I did NOT go back earlier. I taught only 6 units of Berlitz lessons today: 9:30-11:00, 11:00-12:30, and 2:30-4:00.

For lunch, I went down to Ice Park and had a small meal at Café Café. But first I went and took advantage of one of the full-body massages (in a machine that uses warm water) that I had paid for earlier at Dream Spa there.

Here's today's story about David:

Stories about David: Project Caring

When David and I first got together, he introduced me to a project that our synagogue, Beth Chayim Chadashim (BCC), in Los Angeles had been doing for some time. Once a month, a few members gathered at a nursing home to bring a short Shabbat morning service to the residents there. I agreed to go, and it quickly became a monthly routine for David and me.

David told me that, when other members had first invited him to participate, he was reluctant because he wasn’t sure he could deal with the end-of-life situation that such a place so often represents. But they persuaded him, and he had already learned to cherish it. It was easier for me, because I had already been in similar places a number of times.

The staff would bring about 10 to 20 residents into the common area room where we did the service. We always brought one of BCC’s Torah scrolls with us, but we never had an actual Torah service or even took its covering off. Many of the residents were too far gone to really even know what we going on, but they enjoyed the singing and the sense that someone was there paying attention to them. We always took the Torah around so that those who wished to do so could touch it. And there were a few of the residents were really DID know what was happening and especially appreciated it. I’m sure, actually, that not all the people there were Jewish, but that didn’t matter at all.

If David hadn’t gotten me involved with Project Caring, I’m not sure that I would have gone on my own. But I grew to treasure the experience, and it became so meaningful for me.

Wednesday, 20 May 2015

I got up early this morning and got in a nice walk. It was warm but pleasant out.

In the early morning, I went to the vet to buy more food for the cats.

For lunch, I went to Buddha Burgers.

In the evening, 3 WIZO people came for a shiva call: Norman and Angela and Carol. It was very nice of them, and Angela even baked a cake that we all enjoyed.

Tomorrow, I return back to work, and I hope that that will actually help me begin to feel a bit more normal again.

Today story is about a time when David saved the day even though he was blind:

Stories about David: Getting Unstuck from the Gravel in Nakhal Paran

Often when I had time, David would want to get out of the house, so we’d go for a drive. We used to do this even before moving to Israel, and we certainly did it many times here, both when we lived in Tsfat and since we moved to Eilat.

On the 29th of September 2012 (I checked my blog to get the date and remind me of the details of the story), we decided to do such a drive. In this case, I chose to drive on the gravel road down Nakhal Paran (a dry river a little more than an hour’s drive north of here). We started from highway 40, and I hoped we’d be able to go all the way through to highway 90.

These roads are mostly passable to normal cars like ours, but parts of them can be quite rough or sandy or gravelly, and then one really needs a 4-wheel-drive vehicle with higher clearance. Eventually, we did come to some areas with pretty deep loose gravel and barely made it through. A little later, though, the road descended into the stream bed fairly abruptly, and I feared that we might not make it back up that incline if we had to turn around later, so we turned around there.

Unfortunately, when we got back to one of the areas with deep gravel, I didn’t approach fast enough, and we got stuck! The front wheels were in so deep that the bottom of the car was down to the gravel. It was at this point that David, although he was blind at the time, saved the day. He suggested using the floor mats from the car immediately in front of and behind the drive wheels (the front ones, in this case). It took a try or two, but it eventually worked, and we managed to avoid getting stuck again.

After that experience, I was a little more wary of going on these gravel roads. Getting stuck in the middle of the desert on a fairly warm day is NOT a very good idea!

Tuesday, 19 May 2015

I woke up early this morning, but when I stood up, it felt like something sharp was in the side of my heal. It turned out to be just a piece of hard skin where the heal had cracked a bit, but I wasn't sure, so I didn't go out for a walk. It hasn't given me any further trouble, but I'm definitely going to go back to putting קרם רגליים (foot cream) on my feet again when I go to bed. I don't want this to get more serious.

I really enjoyed the WIZO meeting this morning, just talking with people.

For lunch, I had falafel at Mercaz Big.

In the afternoon and evening, I began to think more seriously about what I need to do next. I've come up with some tentative ideas and plans, but I'm not ready to talk about them quite yet. I WILL say, though, that leaving Israel is out of the question!

Today story about David is actually quite amazing:

Stories about David: Achieving His Impossible Dream

For many years, David saw a wonderful psychotherapist named Nancy Weston z”l. I don’t know how it started exactly, but I do know that this amazing woman and very professional counselor treated him from many years, beginning long before I met him and continuing for quite some time after, all completely free!

When he was still blind and quite sick, she asked him what he wanted, what his goals were (according to what David told me, much later, of course). He told her that he wanted a partner, a house, a car, and a driver’s license. I can just picture what must have gone on in her mind at that point -- something like: “Are you crazy?!?” Of course, I’m sure she didn’t say that to him directly.

It’s a good thing he never told me this story, though, until much later. In fact, he DID get all these things. I was the partner, we DID buy a house (and then another one), we eventually had TWO cars, and, of course, he did get a driver’s license (though only in California, never in Israel).

This was the kind of dogged determination that David practiced through his whole life. Even on his deathbed, they had to tie his hand to keep him from foolishly trying to get up and go!

Monday, 18 May 2015

I got up early this morning and got in a full walk, but it was quite hot out, with almost no breeze. In general, in fact, it has been very hot and oppressive here today.

I had 2 errands to run this morning. First, I took David's insulin pump, the supplies for it (reservoirs and injection sets), and glucometer test strips to the nurses at Maccabi. I hope that they can use them or give them to people who can. Of course, they had not yet heard of David's death, so that was a bit shocking for them, too. I conversed with them for some time (all in Hebrew), and they were so nice and supportive. My second stop was Shufersal to do the weekly grocery shopping.

For lunch, I went to Greg Café at Mercaz Big and had a fatoush salad. I also treated myself to a piece of cheesecake since I had received a coupon for it. Afterwards, I stopped by the pharmacy to pick up my prescriptions (only 3) for the month, and then I went and paid the gas bill.

This afternoon, I decided, for no good reason, that the time had come to remove my wedding ring. Of course, I could have continue to wear it indefinitely, but I knew that eventually I'd want to take it off. To tell the truth, I hadn't even thought about it until today. So, I took it off and put it in the same envelope with David's, which they had had to cut off his finger (when he was on the ventilator) because his hands had swollen so much. As you might imagine, this was a very emotional moment for me.

I had no shiva visitors today, but 2 different WIZO friends called me on the phone.

I'll close now with today's story about David, another one also featuring my mom:

Stories about David: A Quilt for Mom

David learned quilting when he was a small boy from various older women in his life. I actually don’t remember exactly from whom.

As we were sorting through my mom’s things when she sold her house, we found a number of pieces that had probably been intended for quilting or other similar purposes. They probably were actually NOT my mom’s because she did NOT do quilting. In fact, it’s likely that they formerly belonged to my mom’s second husband’s first wife. In any case, David decided to use some of them in quilts, and, in particular he made a small one (a lap quilt) for my mom.

David and my mom were VERY close, from the very first time they met. She always considered him to be her “fiat’ son (her son by fiat, because she said so). Even when her memory became worse and worse (or, as she would say, her forgetory became better!) and she didn’t know any of the details anymore, he was always her boy.

David finished the quilt and gave it to her as a present (for her birthday, I think) one year when she was in the board-and-care home. When she opened the package, her face lit up, and she was obviously so happy with it. As she continued to decline, it became her security blanket (like a toddler might have), and she always had it with her. The people at the home must have laundered it an awful lot of times.

When Mom died, we, of course, got the quilt back and took good care of it. We knew its great symbolic value. Over the last few years, David often felt cold, even when it was actually warm. Part of this was due to his feet lying to him, claiming they were freezing when, if you touched them, they were actually quite warm. In any case, I would often put Mom’s little quilt over his feet, and when he knew it was there, he felt warmer. We both appreciated the love that the quilt represents. Here’s a picture of it that I took shortly after his passing:

Sunday, 17 May 2015

I got up early this morning after sleeping well and went for a nice, full walk. It felt a bit warm because there was very little (in any) breeze, but it was still nice.

I got my friend, Moshe (an Israeli), to come with me to the cemetery and then to the place that makes headstones (really, it's a slab that covers the whole grave). I was really thankful to him for agreeing to come with me, because he was able to talk easily with both the guy at the cemetery and the one at the company that makes the slabs. They were both very nice, and I think I really got the cheapest one available, which would please David a lot. I'm not assuming here; we talked about this many times over many years.

My next task was easy enough in itself, but it turned out to be quite difficult emotionally. I needed to decide what to write on the slab and then write it. Somehow, it hit me pretty hard, but I'm pleased with what I've come up with. I called Moshe again to consult about a little of the Hebrew wording. The inscription will be in both English and Hebrew. I was glad that they do NOT include any extra charge for the writing or for the number of letters. My planned writing is not long, but I think it says what I want it to say. I'll post it when it's finalized, and then it will be literally written in stone.

Later, I invited Moshe to go to lunch with me, too, and took him to Chooka, where he had never eaten before. Afterwards, we walked around both levels of Ice Park together and I got the car filled with gas and washed before taking Moshe back home. I was so thankful for his company!

In the evening, I had more shiva visitors. First, my friend Tony and Annette, a couple originally from England, came, and we had a nice chat. Just after they left, two more friends, Liz and Karen, came. David and I used to run into them when we walked to the green strip in the early days here in Eilat. Both are English. Karen lives with her husband just a few doors up the street from us, and Liz also lives somewhere not too far away. I enjoyed an especially nice chat with both of them, who are wonderful women.

In honor or Jerusalem Day (which is today), I'll share this story of David's first visit to Israel:

Stories about David: His First View of the Temple Mount

This story happened before I met David, but he told it to me many times, so I know it was significant to him.

In 1993, he traveled with a group of other LGBT people from California to Israel. They came up to Jerusalem from the backside, from Jericho, and stopped at Mount Scopus to view the city.

David had just begun getting his eyesight back after his first (and longest) period of blindness. In particular, he had had surgery on his left eye, which had been seriously damaged in a mugging some years before. He tells about covering his right eye and being able to see the Temple Mount with his left one. It was a deeply significant and emotional moment for him.

Shabbat, 16 May 2015

I slept well last night and got up fairly early, going out for a nice, full walk this morning.

Friends from our synagogue in Nahariya, Eyal and Esther, who live in Shlomi, next to the Lebanon border not far from the Mediterranean Sea, decided to DRIVE down to visit me here in Eilat today! I could hardly believe it when Esther told me they'd like to come, and it was SO wonderful to see them.

We sat and chatted on the mirpeset (balcony) for a while, and then they took me to lunch at Landwer Café at Ice Park. Afterwards, Esther did some clothes shopping both there at Ice Park and a little later at Mall HaYam. They then dropped me off at my place and started their drive back home. Luckily, Eyal LOVES to drive even more than I do, and he has an Alfa Romeo!

It was really great to see them, and it meant a lot to me. David, too, would be SO pleased at their kindness.

I have now written several stories about David's life, and I'm going to start posting them here, one a day, not in any particular order. So, here's the first one:

Stories about David: A Mother’s Day Surprise

It was Mother’s Day, I don’t remember which year.

My mom was living in The Villa (that might not be its actual name, but it’s how we all referred to it), a retirement apartment building in Loma Linda. She had her own 1-bedroom apartment and a kitchenette, but there was a general dining room where everyone could eat if they wanted. Residents could also make arrangements for visitors to join them for a meal there.

David and my mom had ALWAYS been very close, right from when he first met her. On Friday, he often would come to fix her hair so that she would look beautiful for Shabbat (and she did!). The other ladies at The Villa (there were only a few men, of course) were very jealous of my mom because she had not one but TWO boys who came regularly to visit her.

So, on that particular Mother's Day, we joined Mom for lunch, which was not all that unusual. The interesting part of the story comes later in the day, though. For no known reason, David decided that we should go back and visit mom again. I don’t actually remember how I felt about it, but we did go back.

When we came into the lobby, there was Mom, a woman who had done some work for her on occasion, and one or two staff members of The Villa, signing something. It turned out that the woman, Linda, had gotten Mom to sign for HER to have Mom’s medical power-of-attorney. Mom was sufficiently confused that she didn’t realize the danger, but The Villa employees were more than a little embarrassed at having agreed to be witnesses. We might never have known about this until it was MUCH too late if we hadn’t happened to have come in just then.

As it was, we were able to get Mom to sign papers later giving US medical power-of-attorney, using the services of a friend who was a realtor and a notary public. But we wouldn’t have even known it was necessary if David hadn’t suggested that extra visit. I have no doubt that, later, when Mom needed more care, LINDA was have taken Mom, she would NOT have cared for her very well, and she would have charged a fortune for it, too. Instead, we were able to get mom excellent care in a board-and-care home when she needed it, and she remained there until she died.

Friday, 15 May 2015

I slept well last night until about 2:30 a.m. I often wake up briefly sometime around that hour, but I'm usually able to get back to sleep fairly quickly. This time, however, it just didn't quite work, and I got essentially no real sleep after that. I didn't get up, though, until nearly quarter to 6:00. I felt tired, so I didn't go out for a morning walk, except the short one down to the bakery to buy challah, just before breakfast.

I spent the day fairly quietly. I jotted notes to myself about stories of David that I could write, and I even wrote a couple of them.

For lunch, I had my traditional Friday fare at Il Pentolino.

I got my first shiva visitor this afternoon, a woman from apartment 16 on the 3rd floor of our building named Shalhevet. I actually don't recall even seeing her before, but she was so nice. She couldn't stay long, but she brought some food (which I haven't tried yet but will tomorrow) and told me her family is Moroccan. She also spoke fluent English! It just confirmed for me the wonderfulness of Israelis.

This evening, my friends, Moshe and Barak, had invited me and another friend, Isobel, to their place for Shabbat dinner. So, for the first time in quite a few weeks, I made Shabbat with other people instead of all by myself. That was nice! And, of course, the company and the conversation were also very enjoyable.

Tonight, I'll close with the traditional blessing for mourners:

המקום ינחם אתכם בתוך שאר אבלי ציון וירושלים

May the Divine One comfort you along with the rest of the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem

Thursday, 14 May 2015

I got up fairly early this morning and enjoyed a nice, full walk.

I spent several hours in the middle of the day talking on FaceTime with my daughter in California. We just chit-chatted about all kinds of things. We both enjoyed it so much. I don't know why we don't do it more often. Perhaps we will now.

For lunch, I went to Greg Café at Mercaz Big and had their delicious fatoush salad.

David's funeral was at 5:30, and it wasn't until I got there that I realized that a minyan (10 adult Jewish males) might be a problem. Fortunately, my dear WIZO friends were thinking more clearly, and so managed a minyan very nicely without having to pull in strangers (remember that, very unfortunately, they do NOT count women for a minyan here). The guys who led the prayers seemed like simple but honest and sincere men. Of course, I only picked up words here and there from their mumbling, but they still did an important service. I actually rather like the very basic way they do funerals here in Israel. There is NO casket at all, just the dead person wrapped in a shroud. They simply slide the body off the stretcher into the grave, and then anyone who wants to can participate in shoveling the dirt. It seems shocking at first if you're used to the very euphemistic American way, but it actually is more helpful in accepting the final, shocking reality of death. "Dust thou art, and to dust thou shalt return."

To conclude today's post, I'd like to share a brief life sketch of David that I actually began assembling earlier. This is a just-the-fact-ma'am story of David's life. Later, I'll try to put together and more person and emotional piece about him.

--
David Fyffe z”l was born on 29 December 1955 in Chillicothe, Ohio, and spent most of his childhood in a hollow (small valley) a few miles south of town.

After finishing high school, he went to barber school and, later, beauty school in Columbus, Ohio. For a while, he had his own shop in Columbus.

In the early 80s, he, his partner at that time, and a dear friend of theirs decided to leave Ohio and move to California because they were tired of the cold winters.

Shortly after arriving in California, David embraced Judaism and joined Beth Chayim Chadashim (BCC), a synagogue in Los Angeles with mostly gay and lesbian members. He was very active in the synagogue life and was one of its lay leaders until he moved to Israel.

Around this same time, David was mugged on the street, and his left eye was damaged. A while later, he gradually went totally blind. He remained blind for a number of years and learned to read Braille. After some surgeries, though, his eyesight was restored.

The tragedy of the AIDS epidemic struck the LGBT community very hard around then, as well. David lost his dear partner, James, and more than 300 other friends. He himself was also diagnosed with the disease, but he was lucky enough and smart enough (he demanded the medicines as soon as they became available even though he wasn’t yet that sick) to manage to survive, along with a very few others.

In the autumn of 1995, he met Arlan Wareham at BCC, and shortly thereafter moved in with him. They were united in a beautiful ceremony at BCC on 1 June 1996 and were inseparable after that.

As David’s health improved some, he went back to school to renew his hairdressing license and worked for a while again in that field, but it proved somewhat difficult for him. In 2003, he enrolled in a 2-year program in Computer Network Engineering and completed it in 2005, earning his A.S. (Associate in Science) degree.

Just before the end of 2005, Arlan and David made aliyah (immigrated to Israel) together. They bought a brand new house in Tsfat and began enjoying life in this amazing land.

During the Second Lebanon War, David and Arlan remained in their house in Tsfat for almost the entire time. One morning, a volley of two Hizbollah missiles hit very close to the house, doing some minor damage. A ball bearing from the rocket flew through the bedroom window and within a meter of David’s head as he was getting dressed after a shower, striking the air conditioner near the ceiling on the opposite side of the room.

In February of 2012, Arlan and David sold their house in Tsfat and moved to Eilat, renting an apartment there. Although they both loved the North, the house was too big, and the winters were too cold. Both of them really fell in love with Eilat.

Over the years in Israel, David’s health began to slowly deteriorate. He was hospitalized numerous times for various reasons and was never healthy enough to work in Israel. His health also limited his ability to learn Hebrew, something which he always felt a bit bad about. His cognitive abilities in general also began to decline, almost undetectably at first.

Several months after moving to Eilat, he went totally blind again for no known reason. After some months, his vision returned and then went away again and then returned again. No one was ever able to figure out why, even though he was thoroughly checked.

In his last several months, his cognitive problems became quite a bit more apparent, and he was diagnosed with HIV-related dementia. Although this came and went to some degree, it got to the point where he rarely could manage to get a complete sentence out without forgetting what he was trying to say.

In the last several weeks he was hospitalized 3 times and also spent some time in a long-term care facility.

Early in the morning on 13 May 2015, he finally succumbed to all his illnesses and passed to his eternal rest. He was laid to rest in Eilat on 14 May 2015.

Besides his partner, Arlan, David leaves behind two sisters, Faye and Joyce, and nieces and nephews in the U.S., and a multitude of friends around the world, all of whom will miss him very much.

Wednesday, 13 May 2015

When the phone rang last night at about 2:15 a.m., a shudder immediately went through me because I knew what it must be. Sure enough, it was David's unit at Soroka Hospital telling me I needed to come. I immediately got up and set out to Be'er Sheva, knowing that David would almost certainly not still be alive when I got there (and he wasn't).

The drive in the night, though, was almost magical. As I pulled out of the gas station after filling up and turned toward the big kikar at the north end of town, I saw that the moon had just risen over the Jordanian mountains. I listened to piano music much of the way up, by Chopin and Beethoven. Just as I was crossing Nakhal Paran, the first movement of Beethoven's famous "Moonlight" Sonata was playing, one of David's favorites. You can believe that that made me cry! But it was a beautiful moment, as well.

I went first to the unit, of course, and saw that David had died. Then I had to go to the ER to process some paperwork (it would have been admissions, but they weren't open for another hour, so ER was able to do it). Then I had to arrange for an ambulance to bring David's body to Eilat for burial here (expensive but important -- luckily, burial is free here in Israel). I also had to physically identify his body in the morgue there. I ate breakfast at a restaurant on the hospital campus.

After everything was arranged, I headed back home. I had to take David's teudat zehut (national ID card) to the cemetery to make arrangements there for the funeral (tomorrow, 14 May 2015, at 5:30 p.m.).

Most of the rest of the day I spent reading and answering people's wonderful messages of support, on e-mail and on Facebook. I also went to one of our favorite restaurants for lunch, where the proprietors knew and loved David, and to a frozen yogurt stand that we often used to go to. In both cases, I told the owners about David's passing and about the funeral, and they were so supportive.

Tuesday, 12 May 2015

I didn't actually get to bed until just past midnight last night, which is about 3 hours late for me, but I still got up fairly early this morning and went out for a walk.

I really enjoyed the distraction of the WIZO meeting this morning. Even better, we had a very interesting speaker, a Jewish woman who managed to escape from Iran after the Islamist revolution there (and it wasn't easy!). She told us her story, and it was fascinating!

I decided to go to Ice Park Mall for lunch today, but before I ate, I treated myself to a full-body massage in the machine at Dream Spa there. I've been eyeing them for years but never quite got around to trying them until today. I really enjoyed it -- so much that I paid for 11 more, thereby getting a greatly reduced price, of course. Then I went and had a vegan roast beef salad at Café Café for lunch.

Other than that, I got very little done today. I confess that the waiting and worrying are beginning to take a bit of a toll on me, so I'm trying to be extra good at taking care of myself.

Monday, 11 May 2015

I got up too late to go out for a walk this morning.

I taught one 2-unit Berlitz lesson: 9:00-10:30.

For lunch, I went to Greg Café at Mercaz Big and had their "Country Salad".

Just as I was finishing lunch, I got a call from the ward where David is hospitalized telling me that his condition was very serious and recommending that I come.

So, I quickly paid for my meal, drove back home, did a few things in case I might be away for a while, called Berlitz and asked them to find other teachers for my remaining 4 units (3:30-5:00 and 5:45-7:15), and headed for Be'er Sheva. I deliberately drove about 10 kph faster than my usual speed in order to get there 15 minutes or so earlier.

When I arrived, I found that David was breathing somewhat irregularly and had a hard plastic oxygen mask over both his nose and mouth. He seemed to know when I was touching him, and, of course, I spoke to him. He didn't really open his eyes although his left one was partly open due to the oxygen mask by it. He moved his legs quite a bit and tried to sit up (but couldn't because they have his hands tied to the bed to keep him safe). I touched his chest, shoulders, arms, legs, and hand quite a bit, but I'm not 100% sure he knew I was there -- I think he did, though. I tried to tell him to just relax and not try to do anything, and it seemed to work some of the time. Finally, at 8:00 p.m., I decided not to stay there any longer and headed home, arriving here a little after 11:00. I plan to go up again either tomorrow or Wednesday.

Sunday, 10 May 2015

I got up late this morning, but I still went out for a nice, full morning walk.

My first order of business for the day after breakfast was to go to the Maccabi office to get them to pay for one of David's ER visits. The complication came because he was hospitalized in a different hospital (ER at Joseftal, here in Eilat, and hospitalization at Soroka, in Be'er Sheva). The clerk was able to trace the records and what had happened, and so he faxed the form to pay for the visit.

Later in the morning, I did the weekly grocery shopping, which, of course, was pretty light.

I had vegan "breasts" for lunch today at Café Café. Afterwards, I walked all the way around both the lower and upper levels of the Ice Park Mall. Then I drove to MaccabiPharm to pick up more ibuprofen, since I was almost out of it.

While I was at the market, I received a call from Berlitz asking if I'd like to substitute teach a lesson for a teacher who had called in sick. I don't usually teach on Sundays, but it was a level 5 student, and I didn't have any particular plans, so I agreed to do it, 2 units, 4:30-6:00.

Shabbat, 9 May 2015

I got up a little late this morning because I hadn't slept all that well. I didn't go out for a walk both because of the late rising and because I wanted to get a fairly early start driving up to Be'er Sheva.

I left Eilat shortly after 8:00 a.m., parked in the hospital parking lot just before 11:00 a.m., and arrived at David's ward פנימית ו׳ (Internal Medicine 6) a little after 11:00.

David's condition seemed similar to what I had seen last Wednesday, when he was admitted, but his general awareness and ability to speak were less today, and he now has a feeding tube running to his stomach through his nose. None of this surprised me too much. I was there when the doctor came on rounds, and, after she had finished rounds, I also went to talk with her in the doctors' room. I asked her about his condition, the prognosis, and any treatment plans they had. She replied that they will continue the current treatment, that his condition is מאוד קשה very serious, and that הוא יכול למות he could die. I replied that that was what I thought. So, that's the situation. Only time will tell what will happen next.

The drive up and back was pleasant as usual, and I had prepared a nice playlist of music to entertain me. The wind today was was not strong but was from the south (rather than strong from the north, as usual), so my mileage was actually better on the way up than on the way back (the opposite of what usually happens).

Friday, 8 May 2015

I got up early this morning and got in a full walk, all before the sun appeared above the Jordanian mountains. Later, but still before breakfast, I walked down to the local bakery and bought my usual 2 small whole-wheat challot for Shabbat.

I was scheduled to teach a 1-unit Berlitz lesson (9:00-9:45) this morning, but no one showed up because today is a big holiday all over Europe. In fact, this year's it's the 70th anniversary of Victory in Europe (the end of World War II in Europe).

I had my traditional whole-wheat spaghetti with Palermo sauce at Il Pentolino for lunch today.

I got a little more work done on my variations on HaTikvah for orchestra.

As the sunlight was about to disappear from our beautiful valley, I lit candles, drank sweet red wine, and ate a bit of challah to welcome Shabbat.

Lag B'Omer (Wednesday night and yesterday) got me thinking about fires (I wonder why?), and that reminded of the story of Moses and the burning bush. Here's a short extract:

וירא מלאך יי אליו בלבת-אש מתוך הסנה וירא והנה הסנה בער באש והסנה איננו אכל: ויאמר משה אסרה-נא ואראה את-המראה הגדל הזה מדוע לא-יבער הסנה:

And an angel of Adonai appeared to him from the middle of a fire in a bush, and he saw that the bush was ablaze with fire but was not being consumed. And Moses said, "I must see this great sight -- why isn't the bush being burned?"
[Exodus 2:2-3]

Thursday, 7 May 2015

I got up a little late this morning, but I still went out for a full walk since my first lesson wasn't until 9:30. This morning, I wore only sandals (no socks) and short pants (no shirt) and felt very comfortable.

I taught 8 units of Berlitz lessons today: 9:30-11:00, 11:00-12:30, 5:00-6:30, and 7:00-8:30.

I had to feed Goldfinger in a hurry this morning because I had gotten a mouse out of the freezer for him yesterday morning but had forgotten to feed it to him because of my sudden change of plans yesterday due to David's re-hospitalization.

I had vegan meat balls and rice for lunch today at Buddha Burgers, and afterwards I picked up more cat litter (the pet store I like is just a block up from Buddha Burgers).

Wednesday, 6 May 2015

I got up early this morning and got in a full walk.

I was scheduled to teach 3 units of Berlitz lessons today but only taught 2: 9:00-10:30.

Shortly after I finished teaching this morning, I got a call from the doctor at Bayit B'Lev in Omer telling me that they said sent David back to the Soroka Hospital due to kidney problems. Almost immediately I hopped in the car and set out for Be'er Sheva. When I got there, the ER said he had been sent to P'nimit Vav, the unit where he had been previously, so I walked over there (the opposite side of the campus from the ER). When I got there, he wasn't even there yet, but he arrived shortly thereafter.

I called Berlitz from the hospital and asked them to give my 1-unit lesson at 7:00 p.m. to another teacher so that I wouldn't have to rush home so early.

David was slightly more alert and understandable than he had been on Sunday, but not a lot. I was just relieved that he wasn't worse. However, after some examination of him, the head doctor told me that he had had a myocardial infarction, and I knew that that's fancy language for a heart attack! Obviously, it could have been much worse. Just after she told me, her phone rang, and she said it was the cardiology department returning her call for a consultation. I left and came back home, though, before I found out any more.

I arrived back in Eilat just after 8:30. On my drive on the bypass road, I saw more bonfires than I have seen in the rest of my whole life put together! It was really quite amazing. The reason, of course, is that it's Lag B'Omer (if you don't know what they means, it's best to look it up because the explanation is NOT simple!).

Tuesday, 5 May 2015

I got up early enough this morning to get out for a full and enjoyable walk, wearing socks and shoes, short pants, and a t-shirt. It was perfect!

I really enjoyed talking with people at the WIZO English speakers' meeting this morning, especially since I had had to miss it the last 2 weeks.

For lunch, I went to Greg Café at Mercaz Big and had curried vegetables and rice. Delicious!

In the late afternoon, I had my Berlitz annual performance review, and it actually went quite a bit better than I thought it would. That was nice, and something of a relief, too.

I taught only one 2-unit Berlitz lesson today: 5:30-7:00.

Monday, 4 May 2015

I slept well last night but needed more time and so got up too late to go out for a walk.

I taught 9 units of Berlitz lessons today: 9:00-10:30, 10:30-12:00, 2:45-3:30, 3:30-5:00, and 5:30-7:00.

I went to Café Café at Ice Park and had shakshuka for lunch. Afterwards, I walked around both the lower and upper levels of the mall.

Sunday, 3 May 2015

I woke up fairly early this morning but didn't go out for a walk because I wanted to get out of here fairly early.

I left the apartment just before 8:00 and promptly got stuck in rush-hour traffic. Of course, that's really not so terribly bad here in Eilat!

I was quite disappointed with David's condition today. He could barely talk, and his speech was so slurred that I had a lot of trouble understanding what he was saying, too. It was frighteningly reminiscent of the day he was here at home before his last admission to the hospital, and, as you may recall, that resulted in intubation and dependence on a machine to breathe for about 5 days. I hope we're not once again headed that way!

I met and talked with the social worker, Olga, who was really very nice. I also found out that she's in on Sundays and Thursdays, so I think Sunday will be my regular day to drive up there (rather than Shabbat, as I had previously planned).

I also met and talked with the regular doctor, a woman known as Dr. Victoria (they tend to use first names here, even with doctors!). I expressed my concerns about the deterioration of David's condition and just generally made sure she knew who I was. She thanked me for my participation and cooperation in David's care.

I was rather pleased with myself that I was able to conduct complete, meaningful, and useful conversations with both these women entirely in Hebrew. For the most part, I even felt that I was able to find the words I needed.

The drive up and back was as beautiful as ever, but I did feel pretty tired by the time I arrived back home. My average mileage for the whole trip was over 46.5 mpg despite strong headwinds on the way up and A/C use for the entire trip back. I really love my little Fiat Panda!

Shabbat, 2 May 2015

I slept well but got up quite late. Nevertheless, I went out for a good walk -- I just had to be sure to wear my sunglasses since the sun came up shortly after I started.

In the late morning, I decided to go for another walk, this one in Holland Park, a KKL (Keren Kayemet L'Israel) park in a nakhal on the north side of town. I'm afraid I may have gotten a little sunburn, since I can see the pattern of the tank top I was wearing on my shoulders. It's doesn't hurt, though, not even in the hot shower, so I guess it's not too bad.

For lunch, I went to the Gulf Restaurant, in the hotels area. I ordered a Greek salad, which was very nice, but the best part, I think, was all the delicious סלטים "salatim" (little salads) that they brought me as soon as I set down, before I had even ordered. These included: pickle slices, potato salad, pickled beets, carrot and fennel salad, carrot salad, red cabbage coleslaw, and סלט טורקי Turkish salad (my favorite -- they got the "heat" just right: a little but not too much). Afterwards, I went for a short walk in the area, crossing the draw bridge after waiting while it was open for some sailboats to pass into the harbor.

I also did some mandala coloring today, first by hand, and then digitally, using Graphic Converter.

Finally, I did a little more work on my orchestral variations on HaTikva.

Friday, 1 May 2015

I got up early this morning but didn't go out for a walk because I wanted to get a fairly early start on driving to Be'er Sheva. I did walk down and buy challah for Shabbat, though, before I left.

David's condition is about the same as it's been since last Sunday: still quite weak and still on oxygen, but fairly alert and able to converse reasonably well. I was worried that he'd be demanding to come home, and I knew that wouldn't be possible, but he seemed to understand that he's not strong enough to come home.

I talked to both the nurse and the doctor and left plenty of medicines for David. I needed to bring them from home because some of his meds are not available there.

The drive up and back was very beautiful. The air was clear, the sun was bright, and the desert colors are always so lovely. I considered going up the Arava instead of across the Negev, but I decided against it because the Negev is so nice to see (and the Arava can get just slightly boring -- also, almost all the trucks go up and down the Arava). I had put together quite an interesting playlist of music for the trip, and so that made it even more enjoyable. I once again stopped at Avdat and ate lunch at the Aroma there. This time, though, it was at a normal lunch time.

In the evening, as the last rays of the sun illuminated Aqaba and the mountains of Edom behind it, I lit candles, drank some sweet red wine, and ate a bit of challah to welcome Shabbat.

ויכלו השמים והארץ וכל-צבאם: ויכל אלהים ביום השביעי מלאכתו אשר עשה וישבת ביום השביעי מכל-מלאכתו אשר עשה: ויברך אלהים את-יום השביעי ויקדש אתו כי בו שבת מכל-מלאכתו אשר-ברא אלהים לעשות

And the heavens and the earth and all their hosts were completed. And G-d completed on the seventh day all the work that He had done and rested on the seventh day from all the work that He had done. And G-d blessed the seventh day and made it holy because in it He had rested from all the work that he had created to do.

[Genesis 2:1-3]